Tag Archive for: thanksgiving

Giving God Thanks for You

There is a clear connection between who you are as a leader and your expressions of gratitude. As you know, it is a critical part of your work to make sure others feel appreciated, acknowledged, and valued. So, how do you share your appreciation with those with whom you live, work, and play?

Giving God Thanks

Over the past 30 years, I have expressed my thanks to people who have been especially meaningful and impactful in my life. Before cell phones, I wrote short notes, sent cards, or made phone calls from a landline. I remember some of the first calls I made with a cell phone were expressions of “I’m giving God thanks for you today.” In recent years I have used email and text messages. I have even been known to write a poem or to send flowers. I am not suggesting that you do what I have done, but I am asking, “How do you share your appreciation with those who have had an impact upon your life?”

Gratitude from Philippians

In his letter to the Philippians, Paul expressed his gratitude, “I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy” (Philippians 1:3-4).

Over the years, those words have become one of my favorite scriptures. I have learned, through practice, to pray for you when you come to mind. Even if it is just for a season, you have become a significant part of my life.

So, again during this Thanksgiving week, I am giving God thanks for the people who have helped make me who I am. I am not sure what brings certain people to mind, but I am certain it is God coming to me in and through the people I remember.

Giving Thanks

With that in mind, if you will give a few more minutes of your time, I want to share with you some of the people who have come to mind this week. It might be that some have come to mind because I am writing this blog. But I know others have come to mind because I am particularly grateful for who they are and how God has come to me in and through them.

One of the persons who has come to mind is Mary Handley, my fourth Sunday School teacher. She was the first person to tell me that I would go somewhere in the world and tell people about Jesus. Another person is Carole Duncan, my Sunday School teacher when I was 14 years old. She was the first person I told that I thought God was calling me to preach. She cared for me and nurtured me as if I were her own. And another person is Mel Cummings, my Sunday School teacher, who the day after the Marshall University football team was killed in the plane crash, gathered us close. He listened to our questions, he loved us through our grief, and he cried with us. “I thank my God every time I remember you…”

I have been thinking of several people who were members of churches I served over the years. People who have become special friends, who surrounded my family with love and care, and who shaped my life significantly. People like Don and Betty became parents to Kim and me as they became grandparents to our children. Tom and Barbara made our first move with children less painful and more joy-filled. And Paul and Richard who have become lifelong friends. In fact, I have talked with both this week. “I thank my God every time I remember you…”

I am not sure why, but I am thinking of Dr. Berkowitz, my religion professor at West Virginia Wesleyan College. He turned my world upside down as he taught me to think critically about the scripture. When I think of him, I immediately think of Gerald Harshbarger, a pastor who helped me make sense of what I was learning. The story of Jonah had a larger more significant meaning than a person being swallowed by a whale. Every time I prepare a sermon I think of Fred Craddock and every time I speak of God’s love I think of George Morris. Both were seminary professors at Candler School of Theology. Their influence and impact upon my life is immeasurable. “I thank my God every time I remember you…”

Oh, there are so many of you who come to mind. People like David Cornelius. I first met him in the parking lot of the church asking for a handout. All he wanted was for me to listen to him. Although I thought I knew more about what he needed, he taught me to pay attention to what he was saying. For him, it was a matter of dignity. When I think of David, I also think of John Locke. I first met John as the man who lived in the dumpster behind the church building. He enriched my life the morning that he stood in a worship service and sang “The Lord’s Prayer.” “I thank my God every time I remember you…”

Grateful for You

If you are still with me, I am grateful. God has come to me and deeply shaped my life through so many of you over 48 years of ministry. Along with all of you, I have met in and through the church, I am grateful for my Cabinet colleagues, my district office colleagues, and for each of you who continue to enrich my life in special and unnoticed ways. “I thank my God every time I remember you…”

Today, as I give thanks, I am remembering my wife, Kimberly, my children, and my grandchildren. I am remembering close and special friends. I am remembering the people who have walked along with me through the tough times as well as the good times. I am the person I am today because of their love and care in my life. “I thank my God every time I remember you.”

You know, there are so many of you who come to mind. Just know that I am giving God thanks for you today. I am grateful for you, your ministry, your friendship, and for all God has done to make me who I am in and through you.

Dietrick Bonhoeffer wrote, “In normal life, we hardly realize how much more we receive than we give, and life cannot be rich without such gratitude. It is so easy to overestimate the importance of our own achievements compared with what we owe to the help of others.”

Take Gratitude with You

Who are the people who fill your heart with love, happiness, and gratitude?

Here is what I want you to do. Take a moment to think of three or four people for whom you are grateful. People through whom you have experienced God’s love. Who brings you joy. Who has been influential? Write their names on a piece of paper. You now have a list of people who are special to you.

For the rest of your life, take these names with you wherever you go. Take them to family gatherings and to Sunday worship. Keep them with you on special occasions. And when you move, make sure when everything is packed, you have them with you. Finally, when you come to the end of your life, take your names with you. I know there will be people who will say, “You can’t take it with you,” but take your list of special people with you.

Now, when you get to the gate and Saint Peter is there to greet you, he will ask, “What do you have in your hand?” You will say, “It’s just a list of people who are special to me.” He will say, “Let me see it.” And you will say, “It is just the names of some people, that if it were not for them, I would not be here.” And he will say, “Let me see your names.”

You will give him your list and he will look at you and smile. Then he will say, “I know these people. I just saw them on my over here to greet you. They were making a sign. The sign read, “Welcome Home.”

“I thank my God every time I remember you…”

Who you are is how you lead. Have a blessed Thanksgiving!

Follow Jesus, leadership, Relate to One Another

Leading with Gratitude

If I could give one quality gift to you as a leader, I would give you the gift of gratitude. If I could have God do anything for you, I would ask that God make you a grateful person. Gratitude is the fundamental value of the Christian faith. It has the potential to change the world, as much as impact your relationships.

Over my 45+ years of ministry, I have never known a person who was grateful who was at the same time bitter, hurtful, mean, or vengeful. If you are a grateful person, you will lead with gratitude. Who you are is how you lead.

Recognizing Potential

Leading with gratitude means recognizing and developing the potential of the people entrusted to your care. It means you give people your time. You listen to them, discover their gifts, strengths, and passion. You encourage them and give them opportunities to become more who they are created to be.

Leading with gratitude means you become more generous with people. Because you have developed an attitude of generosity, you begin to believe that everyone wants to perform well and will grow more into who they can be with your care and encouragement. This kind of leadership nurtures humility, brings out the best in people, and creates an atmosphere of trust, compassion, stability, and hope.

To be a truly effective leader, you must know how to lead with gratitude.

Cultivate Gratitude

Gratitude is something you cultivate. It is a foundational building block to who you are as a person. It is so foundational that you might think it is too simplistic or basic to be included as a leadership trait. You might also think that expressing gratitude is obvious, but let me say again, gratitude is something you cultivate as you practice it. The more you practice it, the more you adapt to feeling and expressing it. Developing a practice of gratitude allows you to become the leader for this time and place.

Develop a Gratitude Practice

The question is “where do you start to develop a practice of gratitude?” Well, I am convinced where you start makes a difference. So, start with the grace of God. The words “grace” and “gratitude” have the same root in Greek. In other words, if there is no awareness of the grace of God, there is no gratitude. And there is no gratitude without an awareness of the grace of God.

Luke 17 and Gratitude

In the Gospel according to Luke, there is a story of grace that illustrates the foundation of gratitude. It is the story of ten Lepers healed of their leprosy. (Luke 17:11-19). Leprosy was a physical condition that had broad implications. It was an incurable disease that separated people from one another. It was a living death. Individuals afflicted with leprosy were required, by the prevailing religion, to stay outside the boundaries of the community.

They were physically, as well as socially, isolated from family, friends, temple, and all that gave meaning and purpose to their lives. Individuals with leprosy had no quality relationships outside of the leper community. Their only means of living was to beg for handouts. Not only were they isolated, but they also had the responsibility of announcing their condition to everyone who came close. In other words, because of their condition, they were marginalized, ostracized, and humiliated.

In the story, as Jesus walks by, it is not clear whether they were begging or if they had confidence in Jesus’ power to cleanse them. But as Jesus passed, they cried out, “Jesus, master, have mercy on us.” Although they did nothing to be afflicted with leprosy, they have no rights to which they can appeal. Healing is not owed to them.

Jesus gave them the direction to “Go show yourselves to the priest.” The priest was one who could announce that each of them was cleansed of leprosy. What is interesting here is Jesus gave each of them what was needed for healing and wholeness. His direction was an act of grace.

They followed his direction. Their action of going to show themselves to the priest was their response. On their way, they were healed of their leprosy. They did not first simply believe and then go to the priest. They followed the direction of Jesus. As they followed his direction, they discovered they had been restored to health. Each of them received the same direction, the same grace, and were given hope of a new life.

Each of the ten lepers did what Jesus told them to do. They all received grace. There was no requirement to return. Yet, in a completely spontaneous expression of gratitude, one returned giving thanks and praising God.

Reconnect What is Broken

In this story, leprosy is a symbol of our condition before God. We are broken people, disconnected from God, one another, and ourselves. As much as you want to and try to, you do not have the capacity within yourself to reconnect what is broken. Your hope is in your experience of God’s grace. You respond to your experience by living as you were created to live. It is your response to God’s grace that equips you to lead with gratitude.

Become aware of God’s Grace

So, how do you lead with gratitude? Become aware of God’s grace in your life.

Each day this week, make time to think about being grateful.

Inspiration

Take note of the people who inspired you.

What did you see that made you smile or take notice of their actions?

Keep in mind that no person or experience is insignificant. From the person who started a friendly conversation to the laughter of children, they are all part of what makes you who you are. The small joys are just as valuable as all the others.

Ease of Life

Think about what makes your life easier.

The water in the shower?
Car?
Umbrella?
Cellphone?
A warm coat?

The list goes on. What are you grateful for at this moment?

Past Relationships

Consider past relationships.

Upon whose shoulders are you standing?
What did the person do to make life better for you?
Why are you better off for having known that person?

Give thanks for the toughest relationship of the day.

You will come to experience sincere gratitude, even for difficult people, by looking for the good in your encounters with them.

You

Add to your gratitude list something you are grateful for about yourself.

Although this might feel uncomfortable, take note of what happens when you begin paying attention to what makes you feel good about yourself.

You might even ask yourself why this practice of gratitude makes you feel so uncomfortable. Self-awareness is a gift of grace.

Why not return to give thanks for who you are and for what God has provided to you as a leader?

Gratitude and Grace

Keep in mind that there is no gratitude without an awareness of grace. In the story, ten experienced God’s grace. Ten returned from the world in which they had been isolated. Ten had new lives.

When I was a senior in high school, songwriter and singer, Andre Crouch wrote and recorded a song titled “My Tribute.” The words were as follows:

How can I say thanks for the things You have done for me?

Things so undeserved yet You gave to prove Your love for me.

The voices of a million angels could not express my gratitude.

All that I am and ever hope to be, I owe it all to Thee.

To God be the glory. To God be the glory. To God be the glory.

For the things He has done.

So, how can you say thanks? Be the one who returns living your life in thanksgiving. Become the person you are created to be and lead with gratitude. Who you are is how you lead.

Follow Jesus, leadership, Relate to One Another

Gratitude in Leadership

Have you ever had one of those days when you just felt “out of sorts”? Although nothing catastrophic happened, there were a few insignificant events that ruined the day? As a result, you weren’t in the best of moods. The bumps along the way felt worse than they really were, and by the end of the day, you were exhausted and frustrated.

I had one of those days recently. When I recognized what was going on, I decided I didn’t want to spend the rest of the day feeling crummy or as I say, “grousing around”. It wasn’t fair to my family, to the people around me, or to me. The last thing I wanted was to feel badly because I was a jerk. So, I took a few minutes for myself and focused on the things that had gone well and on the people with whom I had interacted. As I named each one, I gave God thanks for the opportunity to make a difference and for the people who enrich my life.

Gratitude Can Transform Us

I know it might sound strange, but I have learned that gratitude has the power to transform. It is one of the most effective ways to become not only a better leader but also a better person. Gratitude is such a powerful behavior, it can and will enhance your leadership. Almost always, people respond positively to an expression of gratitude.

What we know is this: A grateful leader is:

Respected

Gratitude takes people seriously. When you express your gratitude to someone for his/her work, you are showing them respect and appreciation. When people know you respect them, and take them seriously, you not only gain their respect, but you plant within them the desire to be grateful as well.

Trusted

Gratitude is an expression of authentic care and compassion. It cannot be faked. Think for a minute about a time you heard words like, “Thank you for visiting my mother,” or “Thank you for your sermon,” or “Thank you for your leadership with the committee.” How did you feel when you heard those words? Words of gratitude create a feeling of trust. Now, imagine how the people you lead feel when you express your gratitude to and for them. Expressing your appreciation and gratitude creates the trust followers need from their leader.

Appreciated

Gratitude is always received positively. Every person you know needs and wants encouragement and affirmation. So, when you say, “Thanks, that was awesome!” you are meeting a deep need. Grateful people are seldom angry people. When you express gratitude to and for someone, you not only gain their appreciation but create a positive culture of gratitude.

Exercising Gratitude

Again, I know it sounds strange, maybe even too good to be true. But being a grateful leader is not easy. It requires a change of heart and persistent attention. So, how do you exercise gratitude?

Gratitude has an object.

To be truly grateful, your gratitude is focused upon a person or an event. Biblical writers are clear about the object of this gratitude:

o “Oh, give thanks to the Lord” (Psalm 105:1)

o “Thanks be to God” (2 Corinthians 9:15)

You can’t express gratitude in a vacuum. Gratitude, by its very nature, has an objective.

Gratitude is genuine.

You can’t fake thankfulness. You may be able to pretend you are grateful for a while, but unless you are deeply and truly thankful, it’s not going to work. The good news is, by intentionally exercising gratitude on a daily basis, you can build up your gratitude muscle, and cultivate genuine gratitude.

Gratitude is expressed frequently.

Thanksgiving is more than one day a year. A family gathering, with turkey, once a year is okay. But what is needed is a daily reminder to be thankful or a daily pattern of gratitude. To build your gratitude muscle, you will have to express it not annually, not monthly, not even weekly. Gratitude is a daily effort. When you think about it, there are a lot of things for which to be grateful, but the one thing to remember is: Gratitude is expressed frequently.

Gratitude is specific.

Gratitude is not generic. As previously mentioned, gratitude has an objective, but it also has an immediate cause. Try these words of gratitude: “I’m really thankful for the way you handled that tense situation in the board meeting. You spoke softly, in a controlled way, but you also showed them why we need to move forward. Thanks for doing that.” Or “Thank you for that email last night. I know you stayed up to write it, and it was exactly the information needed for the meeting. Thank you for your hard work, and the detailed information.” You get the point. Be specific.

If I could give one quality gift to each of my family members and to all you, my friends and colleagues, it would be the gift of gratitude. If I could have God do anything for you, I would ask God to make you grateful. Gratitude is the central virtue of the Christian faith. Over my 45+ years of ministry, I have never known a person who was grateful who was at the same time bitter, hurtful, or vengeful.

Strengthen Your Gratitude Muscle

During the month of November and into the month of December, Sara Thomas and I are inviting you to strengthen your gratitude muscle by participating in two things:

Daily 8:46 Prayers

Every evening at 8:46, Sara will post a prayer of gratitude for the evening on the Transforming Mission Facebook page and Instagam account. These prayers are short sentence prayers designed to assist you in developing a pattern of gratitude.

Giving Thanks Podcast Mini-Series

Every Thursday, from November 5 – December 10, Sara and I will provide a podcast focused upon gratitude for the week. Each podcast is designed to give thanks for the way God has gifted you to lead through these days of uncertainty and chaos. This is one way we want to thank you for your leadership.

Thank You

Every list of the characteristics of leaders different. Gratitude doesn’t make many of those lists. I think it is time to change that. I challenge you to put a little gratitude into your leadership. I think you will be pleasantly surprised.

Sara Thomas and I are grateful for you and your leadership. In gratitude for you, we are making ourselves available to assist you in your work of leading, serving, and caring. When Sara or I can be of encouragement or help to you, contact us at connect@transformingmission.org. Sara and I are ready to assist you in becoming the leader you are created to be. Don’t hesitate to call as we seek to assist you in deepening your relationship with Christ, the church, and your community.

Courage, Follow Jesus, leadership, Relate to One Another

Look at What You Have Done

How are you doing today? To say the least, you have been through a lot this year. I don’t need to rehash all the events that have changed your ways of living over the past several months, I know that each of us has struggled in our own ways. Whether it has been with the changes in worship, gathering in groups, learning new technology, caring for family while balancing work, illness, anxiety, depression, or any number of other changes, we have each had our challenges.

Today, I want us to shift our perspective.

Because we use so much of our brain space worrying about what is coming next, grieving over what once was, and struggling with anxiety in the present, we often forget how much we have accomplished. Whether family, friends, neighbors, church members, you have had a tremendous impact upon the people entrusted to you. Even when it didn’t feel like you were making a difference, you were successfully navigating some huge obstacles.

So, give me a few minutes of your time today. If you are willing, I want you to stop and focus upon yourself. You have given much of yourself, as well as time, looking after and caring for others. Now it is time for a little self-care.

Self-Care Isn’t Selfish

Think about something you have accomplished over the past seven months? Take a deep breath and be honest with yourself.

Feels good doesn’t it? What challenges did you have to overcome? What have you learned that can be used in the future or is helpful now?

It is okay to feel good about it. You have made some substantial accomplishments, but it doesn’t have to be anything big. Just think about what you have done. Did you learn to cook something you haven’t cooked before, start a new exercise routine, or take up water coloring? Maybe it was keeping your children fed and clothed as you navigated the chaos of becoming an at-home teacher. When you set boundaries, either with work or in your personal life, you accomplished something significant.

So be kind to yourself and take notice of some of the small things you have accomplished, because when you build on those things, you can put your life and leadership into perspective. Some days it is easy to forget just how strong and impactful you have been.

What Does Love Look Like?

Are you willing to give me a few more minutes? If you are, consider these things:

Reflect upon times when you experienced love over the past seven months. When were you vulnerable and empathetic? Where did you take people seriously, even when you felt it was difficult to do? When did you listen to and make a place for people with whom you disagree? Whether it was with family, friends, church members, or strangers, where did you provide a caring and safe place for people to become who God had created them to be?

Get one or two of those people or moments in your mind. Now breathe deeply and whisper this prayer, “O God, thank you for loving people through me and thank you for loving me through those same people. Amen”

Reflect on Joy

Reflect upon times when you experienced joy.

Over the past seven months, what has made you stop to remember God’s goodness and to give God thanks? What was taking place when you realized your interaction with people was a response of gratitude for God’s grace? When did you feel at one with God and the people around you?

Think about a time when you laughed so hard you cried, a time you were amazed by God’s presence, and a moment you wanted to capture and to hold. Get one or two of those people or moments in your mind.

Now breathe deeply and whisper this prayer, “O God, thank you for the deep joy you have planted in my heart. Help me be so joyful that the people around me experience your joy in and through me. Amen.”

You’re Generous

Reflect upon the moments you experienced generosity.

When did you give someone the benefit of your doubt? When did you show God’s kindness and goodness to people entrusted to your care whether they deserved it or not? When did you say to yourself, “I know he is doing the best he can.” Or “How can I help her take the next step?”

Get one or two of those people or moments in your mind. Now breathe deeply and whisper this prayer, “O God, thank you caring for people in and through me. Help me to be open to receive your kindness and goodness through them. Amen”

Courageous Action

Reflect upon the situations where you experienced courage.

What risks did you take? When did you have to be vulnerable? What empowered you to make decisions and lead through difficult situations? Who were the people that came alongside you to encourage you?

Get one or two of those people or moments in your mind. Now breathe deeply and whisper this prayer, “O God, thank you for giving me the strengths and skills to lead with courage. By your grace, give me the courage to assist others to live and lead courageously. Amen.”

Look at What You’ve Done!

As a leader, you have accomplished more than you have given yourself credit for accomplishing. You have been gifted to lead at this time in history. People are looking to you to be the leader they can trust, a leader of compassion, a leader who is stable, and a leader who offers genuine hope.

You can and will lead through this present crisis. At the moment, we are in the middle of a mess. But because you have taken the time to reflect upon what God has done in and through you, you are able to step and out to lead with courage and grace.

Take Action

Are you still with me? Here is the last thing I’m asking you to do.

Call, text, email a trusted friend or colleague and tell them what you have accomplished. Give them the opportunity to celebrate with you. At your best, you cannot be who God created you to be alone. Remember, it is okay to feel good, so celebrate.

If you don’t have someone with whom you feel comfortable sharing, then call, text, or email me. It would be my pleasure to celebrate your accomplishments with you.

Grateful for You

I am grateful for you and your leadership. You have accomplished much. Now is the time to stop and catch your breath before stepping back into the mess.

Just remember, you will get through this by staying focused upon the God who has gifted you. Keep focused on how God has already used you to make a significant difference in the lives of the people entrusted to your care.

Don’t forget, when Sara Thomas or I can be of encouragement or help to you, contact us at connect@transformingmission.org. Sara and I are ready to assist you in becoming the leader you are created to be. Don’t hesitate to call as we seek to assist you in deepening your relationship with Christ, the church, and your community.

O God, thank you for my friends and colleagues. Thank you for the ways you have enriched my life in and through them. By your grace, embrace them through me so we can be the leaders you need us to be at this time in history. I offer them to you in the name of Jesus. Amen

Follow Jesus, Gospel, Relate to One Another

Gratitude

Over the past several weeks I have been asking friends and colleagues, “For what are you grateful?”

One friend thought a moment and said, “I am grateful for the paperweight on my desk. I have had it for over 30 years. It is an ordinary rock that has red and yellow paint splattered on it. It is not worth much, but I wouldn’t sell it for any amount of money in the world. My son was 5 years old when he made it for me in a Sunday School class. It is a symbol of his love.

Another friend said, “I love the homemade greeting card I got from my daughter. On the front of the card, she drew a picture of the earth and wrote the words, “To the World’s Most Sweetest Mom.” Inside the card she wrote, “Happy Birthday,” then scratched through it and wrote, “Happy Mother’s Day.” She signed the card, “Love, Sarah (6 years old)” When she gave me the card, she pointed out her mistake inside and said, “Even though I made a mistake, you are the same Mom.”

Other friends and colleagues named things like family, friends, work, relationships. One person even said, “I’m grateful for my district superintendent.”

Well, how cool is that?

The Practice of Gratitude

As I have listened, I have learned three things about you:

You are people of gratitude.
You are most grateful for your relationships
Your gifts are valuable because of the giver of those gifts.

I think that is genuine gratitude. Focusing upon the giver of the gift rather than on the gift itself. To paraphrase Paul’s letter to the Corinthians, “You can gain the whole world and all the gifts in it, but without gratitude, you will miss the giver and lose your soul.” Celebrating the giver rather than the gift is the point. When you make that breakthrough, you will never be the same. That kind of gratitude will change your life.

So, let’s put our gratitude into action. I want you to think of someone for whom you are grateful. Someone who has brought love, joy, and gladness into your life. Someone who, because of their generosity, has changed your life. Get that person’s face in our mind and name on your lips.

Two Sides of Gratitude

Now, let me tell you about Bonnie Shepherd. She was having surgery two weeks before Christmas. She said it was a terrible time to be in the hospital, but her husband assured her that he could take care of things at home. But she wrote, “Christmas baking, shopping, and decorating would have to wait.”

She said, “I struggled to open my eyes after sleeping for almost two days following surgery. As I became more alert, I looked around to what seemed like a Christmas floral shop. Red poinsettias and other bouquets crowded the windowsill. A stack of cards waited to be opened. On the stand next to my bed stood a small tree decorated with ornaments my children had made. The shelf over the sink held a dozen red roses from my parents…and a yule log with candles from our neighbor. I was overwhelmed by all the love and attention.”

That day, she watched a heavy snowfall outside the hospital window. She began thinking about her four children. Her husband had told her that friends had brought meals and offered to care for the children. She began to imagine them bundled in their snowsuits building a backyard snowman and skating at the outdoor ice rink. Then, she thought of her son, Adam. He had a physical disability. At age 5 he had just started walking independently. She worried about him on the ice and snow with his thin ankles. She wondered if anyone would take him for a sled ride?

More Flowers

About that time, she heard the nurse’s voice, “More flowers!” The nurse handed her the card from the beautiful centerpiece and then made room for the bouquet among the poinsettias on the windowsill. She took more cards from her pocket and put them on the tray. Before leaving the room, she pulled back the pale green privacy curtain between the two beds.

While Bonnie was reading her get-well cards, she heard, “Yep, I like those flowers.” It was the woman in the bed beside her. She had pushed the curtain aside so she could see better. “Yep, I like those flowers,” she said again.

Bonnie said her roommate was a small 40-something woman with Down’s syndrome. She had short, curly, gray hair and brown eyes. Her hospital gown hung untied around her neck, and when she moved forward it exposed her bareback. Bonnie said she wanted to tie it for her but she was still connected to an IV. The woman stared at the flowers with childlike wonder.

Bonnie spoke to her. “I’m Bonnie. What’s your name?”

“Ginger,” she said, rolling her eyes toward the ceiling and pressing her lips together after she spoke. “Doc’s gonna fix my foot. I’m going to have suur-jeree tomorrow.”

Bonnie and Ginger talked until dinnertime. Ginger told her about the group home where she lived and how she wanted to get back for her Christmas party. She never mentioned a family. Every few minutes she reminded Bonnie of her surgery scheduled for the next morning saying, “Doc’s gonna fix my foot.”

Plans and Visitors

That evening, Bonnie had several visitors, including her son Adam. Ginger talked with everyone who entered the room, telling each of them about Bonnie’s pretty flowers. She kept an eye on Adam. Later that evening, when everyone had gone, Ginger repeated over and over how much she liked the flowers and then she said, “I like your Adam too.”

The next morning, while Ginger was in surgery, the nurse helped Bonnie take a walk down the hall. When she returned to her room, she noticed the contrast between the two sides of the room. Ginger’s bed was neatly made, waiting for her return. But she had no cards, no flowers, and no visitors. Bonnie said her side of the room bloomed with flowers, and the stack of get-well cards reminded her of just how much she was loved.

No one sent Ginger flowers or cards. Bonnie began to wonder if it was going to be that way for Adam one day. She quickly decided that she would give Ginger something. Some of her flowers.

Justified Guilt?

She walked to the window and picked up the red-candled centerpiece with holly sprigs. She thought, “This would look great on our Christmas dinner table.” So, she set the piece down. What about the poinsettias? Then she thought about how much the deep-red plants would brighten the entry of her turn-of-the-century home. And of course, she could not give away her Mom and Dad’s roses.

Bonnie said the justifications kept coming: the flowers are beginning to wilt; this friend would be offended; I really could use this when I get home. She said she could not part with anything. So, she climbed back into bed. She calmed her guilt with a decision to call the hospital gift shop when it opened in the morning. She would order Ginger some flowers of her own.

When Ginger returned from surgery, a candy-striper brought her a small green Christmas wreath with a red bow. She hung it on the bare white wall above Ginger’s bed. That evening, Bonnie had more visitors. Even though Ginger was recuperating from surgery, she greeted each visitor and proudly showed them her Christmas wreath.

Home In Time for Christmas

The next morning, after breakfast, the nurse returned to tell Ginger that she was going home. “The van is on its way to pick you up.” Bonnie felt happy for Ginger. She would be home in time for her Christmas party, but Bonnie felt guilty when she remembered that the hospital gift shop would not open for two more hours. She looked around the room at her flowers one more time.

The nurse brought the wheelchair to Ginger’s bedside. Ginger gathered up what few things she had and pulled her coat from the hanger in the closet. Bonnie said, “I’ve really enjoyed getting to know you, Ginger.” She said her words were sincere but she was feeling bad for not following through on her good intentions.

The Gift of Gratitude

The nurse helped Ginger with her coat and into the wheelchair. Then she removed the small wreath from the nail on the wall and handed it to Ginger. They turned toward the door to leave when Ginger said, “Wait.” Ginger stood up from her wheelchair and hobbled slowly over to Bonnie’s bed. She reached out her hand and gently laid the small wreath in Bonnie’s lap. “Merry Christmas. You are a nice lady.” Then Ginger hugged Bonnie.

Bonnie whispered, “Thank you.” She said she could not say anything more as she watched Ginger hobble back to the chair and out the door. She looked at the small wreath in her hands and thought, “Ginger’s only gift. And she gave it to me.” As she looked toward Ginger’s bed, she saw, again, her side of the room was bare and empty. But as she heard the elevator doors closing, Bonnie said, “I experienced gratitude as I had never experienced it before. I don’t think I will ever be the same.”

Your Next Step

Now, let’s go back to the person I asked you to remember.

Get that person’s face in your mind and name on your lips
Give God thanks. You are who you are today because of that person’s presence and influence.
How will you express your gratitude? make a phone call? send a text? bake cookies? What one thing will you do to express your gratitude?
Now, do it!

By God’s grace, you express your gratitude by loving as you have been loved. When gratitude overtakes you, you forget to be afraid. You become able to trust and you have time for the greater things in life. Once you experience and express your gratitude, you will never be the same.

Engage Your Community, Follow Jesus, Gospel, Uncategorized

The Hope of Engagement

Is it possible for the church to be a center of hope and healing in your community? If so, what needs to happen to make it so?

Consider the people in your community this week of Thanksgiving and beyond. When we pause to reflect on how the church can be the center of hope and healing, we consider engagement with people in our communities all year.

Penny Lernoux described engagement in the community and the world this way, “You can look at a slum or peasant village, but it is only by entering into the world, by living in it, that you begin to understand what it is like to be powerless, to be like Christ.”

What is Engagement?

It is living grace and truth in the communities in which we live.
Engagement is reaching out and receiving people, offering Christ by living and loving as God in Christ has loved us, growing in a Christian community, and living out our faith in the communities in which we live.
Engagement is the weaving together of Wesley’s “personal piety and social holiness” in the development of relationships with the community. Wesley modeled care and compassion for the hungry and hurting. He knew at the center of life-transformation were relationships with people in a variety of life circumstances.

What would happen if your congregation began to “enter the community” to develop relationships with local schools, with people living in poverty, with health care facilities? What would happen if you began to pray with people from your congregation, “What do we need to do that no one else is doing?”

We believe you would take a giant step toward, not only offering hope but, by becoming hope.

Extend the Table Throughout the Year

As we celebrate the ways we bless people from Thanksgiving to Christmas, we also pause. What we do at the end of the year offers hope to our communities. We celebrate the connections we make with people, the ways needs are met during the winter, and the joy that comes from being a blessing to others.

We also know hope is needed the entire year.

Perhaps what you do this week and in the weeks to come to engage with people in your community will be the spark for a quarterly, monthly, or occasional experience with your community. Said more directly, our hope is the relationships you nurture in the coming weeks will be seeds of hope for your engagement in the community in 2019.

Whatever this week and the weeks ahead bring for you and the church, may you consider how God is inviting you to be an agent of hope.

Hope for A Blessed Thanksgiving

Tomorrow we will celebrate with family and friends. We will serve meals in our communities and perhaps enjoy a football game on television. There will be laughter and conversation, new connections and reunions. While we gather, we ask you to consider how we can intentionally extend the table throughout the year.

“I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy.”

-Philippians 1:3-4

It is our hope that as you continue leading people to follow Jesus by engaging in the community, there will be one who will say to you, “I thank my God every time I remember you…”

We give God thanks for you and your leadership. We are grateful for how God has shaped and enriched our lives through you. May each of you be as blessed as you have been a blessing.

O God, by your grace, shape us into your loving presence in the world. Thank you for the opportunity to be partners with you in your work of transformation in Jesus’s name. Amen

-Tim Bias and Sara Thomas

Follow Jesus, Relate to One Another

Thanks

If I could give one quality gift to each of my family members and to all my friends, it would be the gift of gratitude. If I could have God do anything for you, I would ask that God make you grateful. Gratitude is the central virtue of the Christian faith. Over my 40+ years of ministry, I have never known a person who was grateful who was at the same time bitter, hurtful, mean, or vengeful.

One Returned in Gratitidue

In the story of the ten Lepers found in Luke 17:11-19, all ten are healed but only one, an outsider, returned in gratitude. Lepers, because of their condition, were required to stay outside the boundaries of the community. They were socially, religiously, and physically isolated from family, friends, church, and all that was important to them. They had no quality relationships outside of the leper community. Not only were they isolated, they had the responsibility of announcing their condition to everyone who came close. Then into their lives walked Jesus. They cried out, “Jesus, master, have mercy on us.”

Jesus gave them the direction, to “Go show yourselves to the priest.” What I think is interesting here is Jesus gave each of them what was needed for healing and wholeness. His direction was an act of grace. It was on their way to see the priest that all of them were healed. All 10 were healed and given new lives. All ten received the same treatment, the same grace. But only one returned in gratitude.

I believe, without any stretching of the truth, that leprosy in the scripture is a symbol of our fallen human condition before God. We are sinners, disconnected from God, one another, and our communities. In our condition, we do not have the capacity within ourselves to reconnect with God and to one another. Our hope is that Jesus, the embodiment of God’s grace, comes into our lives. Just as with the lepers, our relationships are restored, God’s peace takes root deep within us, and we live new lives. New lives in Christ.

Are We Grateful?

In the story, ten lepers are healed but one returned in gratitude and praise.

I confess that I have always thought of the church as the community of the grateful. We gather in response to God’s grace to offer ourselves in gratitude for what God has done, not only for us, but for all people. We connect with people in our communities in response to God connecting with us in Jesus. Recently, I have wondered what it is like in the churches in the Capitol Area South District. All of us have been offered new life by God’s grace. My question is, “Are we grateful?”

There is a story told about Rudyard Kipling. He was being interviewed by a reporter who said, “Mr. Kipling, I just read that somebody calculated that the money you make for your words amounts to over $100 a word. The reporter reached into his pocket, pulled out a $100 bill, gave it to Kipling and said, “Here is a $100. Now give me one of our $100 words.” Kipling looked at the money. Put it in his pocket. Looked at the reporter and said, “Thanks!”

There were ten healed. Ten who returned to the world from which they had been isolated. Ten who had been invited by grace to a new life. But only 1 who returned as an expression of gratitude.

The words “grace” and “gratitude” have the same root in the Greek. In other words, if there is no awareness of grace, there is no gratitude. There is no gratitude without an awareness of grace. In the story, all received grace but only one returned with gratitude and praise.

I was just wondering…are you the one? Are you the one?