What comes to mind when you hear or read the word “community”? A group of people united by geographies like a neighborhood, town, or city? Or perhaps a group of people who share the same interests or activities like civic clubs or service organizations? Maybe a group of people who focus on Christian faith and following Jesus? What comes to mind? 

Developing community is one of the characteristics of a Christ-centered leader. The question is what kind of community are you developing? 

Two Distinct Ideas of Community

To resource you as a Christ-centered leader, I want to focus on two distinct ideas of community. The first is koinonia found in the New Testament. The second is the community in which your congregation is located. In both communities, you have opportunities to share the gospel and to grow in relationship with Jesus and the people entrusted to your care. 

To focus on these two concepts, keep in mind that the foundation of Christ-centered leadership is Jesus. So, through the lens of being a Jesus follower, what does it mean to live in community with other Jesus followers and what does it mean to be a Jesus follower in the midst of a diversity of people and beliefs? 

To get an idea of what it means to develop community, let’s look at koinonia, the New Testament understanding of fellowship. 

Read: Acts 2:42-47 

They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers. Awe came upon everyone because many wonders and signs were being done through the apostles. All who believed were together and had all things in common; they would sell their possessions and goods and distribute the proceeds to all, as any had need. Day by day, as they spent much time together in the temple, they broke bread at home and ate their food with glad and generous hearts, praising God and having the goodwill of all the people. And day by day the Lord added to their number those who were being saved. 

Reflect

The first followers of Jesus, “…devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and fellowship…” Gathering in community was important. It is mentioned three times: They devoted themselves to “fellowship” (verse 42), “All who believed were together” (verse 44), and “Day by day, as they spent much time together in the temple…” (verse 46). Being together was an important characteristic of their faith development. 

What is Koinonia?

This fellowship was known as “koinonia.” Before describing what it is, let’s identify what it is not. It is not formal gatherings for potluck dinners or informal gatherings with family and friends like us. It is neither being a part of a country or civic club nor is it like being a part of a service organization. Koinonia is even more than participating in worship. All of these are good and needed, but they do not describe what those early followers of Jesus experienced as koinonia. 

Koinonia for them was gathering to listen and learn of the gospel (apostles’ teaching). They were trying to make sense of what they had experienced at Pentecost. Gathering was to eat together, (breaking of bread). It was an expression of God’s love, agape, working for the good of others, especially those who had little to eat. Gathering to pray (prayers). They gathered with glad and generous hearts in gratitude to God, seeking direction on how to live their lives as followers of Jesus. 

John Wesley on Community

It is this same koinonia that John Wesley experienced when he expressed that “I felt my heart strangely warmed, I felt I did trust Christ, Christ alone for salvation; and an assurance was given me that he had taken away my sins, even mine, and save me from the law of sin and death.” 

Wesley was motivated to establish a koinonia system to help others, whose hearts were also “strangely warmed.” He was surrounded by people who not only wanted to hear the gospel but wanted to experience it. They lived in a time of spiritual apathy in which there was a disconnect between themselves and their faith. There was also an institutional disconnect that created disillusionment and distrust of the church. 

Aldersgate Community

Wesley’s Aldersgate experience became a model for heartfelt faith. For the people whose hearts were warmed by God’s love, Wesley developed a system to help keep the heartfelt faith alive with experiences of care, support, encouragement, and correction. 

He developed community by using class meetings and bands in which followers of Jesus were nurtured in faith and held accountable with compassion. People cared for and looked after each other’s souls. It was in the fellowship where loving hearts set other hearts on fire. 

Koinonia was woven into the DNA of those early Christians called Methodists. Whether you are United Methodist or not, the koinonia has shaped your faith as a Jesus follower. It is an essential experience in assisting you in becoming who you are created to be. 

Shaped by Community

Although I did not know it at the time, my earliest memories of faith are of people teaching, caring, supporting, and encouraging me in the faith community. Whether it was a fourth-grade Sunday school teacher telling me I would go somewhere else in the world to tell others of Jesus, a junior high school teacher who taught me to pray and to listen for God to speak, a high school teacher who cried with the class the day after a major disaster, or the Jesus followers who nurtured me in faith with compassion from a child to an adult, koinonia was part of my experience in becoming who I am today. 

Over the years I have attempted to develop koinonia through small groups or other fellowship experiences, but where I have experienced it most was when it was part of who we were as a community of faith. It was when other Jesus followers, whose hearts were warmed with God’s love, shared their faith and love with one another, the larger community, and the world. 

Leading Community

You are a leader of a heartfelt faith. There are two aspects of this heartfelt faith: the experience of God’s love in the life of each individual; and the gathering of followers of Jesus who have experienced God’s love. Think clearly about how to provide opportunities for the “warm heart” and the structures of care that will be a setting for the transformation of individual lives, communities, and the world. 

When Wesley insisted that “true Christianity cannot exist without the inward experience and the outward practice of justice, mercy, and truth,” he gave us our focus on koinonia. 

Questions for Reflection

Reflect on these questions for yourself:

  • How is my relationship with Jesus?
  • Has my heart been warmed by God’s love?
  • How do I grow in faith and live out my faith in meaningful ways? 

Reflect upon these questions for your community:

Am I developing the structures of care where people can grow in grace and discipleship, where the fruits of the spirit are being cultivated, and where loving hearts are setting others’ hearts on fire? 

The early followers of Jesus “devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and fellowship…” So, one of the characteristics of Christ-centered leaders is to develop koinonia, Christian community.

Respond

O God thank you for a heartfelt faith and for the fellowship you have provided for me to grow in my faith. By your grace, continue to introduce me to people who can provide care, support, instruction, and correction to my faith. Thank you for the ways you have provided for me to become more of the person you have created me to be. Give me the faith to trust you more. In Jesus’ name,. Amen.

Return

Give God thanks for the people you encountered today. In whom did you meet Jesus? How was your heart strangely warmed? What structures did you put in place to give others care, support, encouragement, and hope? What do you need to do to lead others into koinonia? Give God thanks for the opportunities you had to become more who God has created you to be. 

Next week we will look at the characteristics of the community as your mission field. As you learn and grow keep in mind, who you are is how you lead.

How often have you read or heard me say, “Who you are is how you lead”? This past week I realized I have done a lot of writing about the characteristics of leaders but have not focused on the foundation of Christ-centered leadership. It has been implied, but not specific. Over the next several weeks, I want to be more focused and specific on what it means to be a Christ-centered leader. 

The very foundation of Christ-centered leadership is, of course, Jesus. But what does it mean to be a leader who is a follower of Jesus? Let’s look at some distinguishing characteristics of Christ-centered leaders. 

As much as I want to begin with having the heart, mind, and work of Jesus, I want to save the best to last. So, let’s start with some distinguishing characteristics of the first followers of Jesus as found in The Acts of the Apostles. 

Read Acts 2:42-47 

They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers. Awe came upon everyone because many wonders and signs were being done through the apostles. All who believed were together and had all things in common; they would sell their possessions and goods and distribute the proceeds to all, as any had need. Day by day, as they spent much time together in the temple, they broke bread at home and ate their food with glad and generous hearts, praising God and having the goodwill of all the people. And day by day the Lord added to their number those who were being saved. 

Reflect

Look at the words, “They devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching…” The apostles were the first to teach, preach, and live the good news of Jesus. The question is, “What is the good news?” Part of the answer can be found in the New Testament gospels. For example: 

Good News to Matthew

In the gospel according to Matthew, the good news is “God sent Jesus to teach us how to live a holy life.” The word “holy” in the scripture means to be “different” or “separated” as in being different from others. God is a different God. To be daughters and sons of God, we are to live as God created us to live. God sent Jesus to teach us how to live differently. To live life the way God created us to live life. 

The way Jesus says it is “Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect” (Matthew 5:48). Jesus said these words in the context of developing relationships with people. The word perfect is used as “complete” or “whole.”  You and I are complete and whole, or holy as God is complete, whole, or holy in the way we love others. God sent Jesus to teach us how to live as we have been created to live in relationship with people we encounter each day. 

So, when you are offering your gift at the altar, if you remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother or sister, and then come and offer your gift. (Matthew 5:23-24). Holiness is seen in everyday relationships. But not only in your everyday relationships… 

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you (Matthew 5:43-44). Holiness is seen in the way you relate to and love your enemies. 

Relationships are so important that you are to be a person of integrity even in your speech. “Again, you have heard that it was said to those of ancient times, ‘You shall not swear falsely, but carry out the vows you have made to the Lord.’ But I say to you: Do not swear at all, either by heaven, for it is the throne of God, or by the earth, for it is his footstool, or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the great King. And do not swear by your head, for you cannot make one hair white or black. Let your word be ‘Yes, Yes’ or ‘No, no;’ anything more than this comes from the evil one” (Matthew 5:33-36). Holiness is seen in your integrity. 

But that is not all, your holiness is seen in your forgiveness of others. Then Peter came and said to him, “Lord, if my brother or sister sins against me, how often should I forgive? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “Not seven times, but I tell you, seventy-seven times” (Matthew 18:21-22). Holiness is seen in the grace to forgive as many times as it takes. 

God sent Jesus to teach us how to live with one another. 

Good News in Mark

In the gospel according to Mark, the good news is that “God sent Jesus to oppose the evil, pain, and suffering of the world. “Jesus and his followers went into Capernaum. Immediately on the Sabbath Jesus entered the synagogue and started teaching. The people were amazed by his teaching, for he was teaching them with authority, not like the legal experts. Suddenly, there in the synagogue, a person with an evil spirit screamed, ‘What have you to do with us, Jesus of Nazareth? Have you come to destroy us? I know who you are. You are the holy one from God.’”

“Silence!” Jesus said, speaking harshly to the demon. “Come out of him!” The unclean spirit shook him and screamed, then it came out. (Mark 1:21-26)

Through Mark’s story, Jesus faces the suffering and pain people are facing and he restores them to health and wholeness. Whether it be the demons in the synagogue or leprosy. When someone suffered leprosy, the person was separated from family, community, work, worship, everything that was meaningful. When Jesus healed a person with leprosy, he not only restored them to physical health, but he healed relationships broken by isolation, alienation, and separation as well.

God sent Jesus to face what separates us from God and from one another and overcomes it. Jesus gives us hope with new life and direction.

Good News in Luke

In the gospel according to Luke, Jesus is the one who helps us get through the barriers of theology, race, nation, and gender. The angel who came to Mary came with good news saying, “Do not be afraid, Mary. You have found favor with God” (Luke 1:30). And the angel who came to the shepherds came with good news, “Do not be afraid, for I bring you good news of great joy for all the people: to you is born this day in the city of David a Savior…” (Luke 2:10-11) “And when Jesus started his ministry he said, “The Spirit of the Lord is upon me because the Lord has anointed me. He has sent me to preach good news to the poor, to proclaim release to the prisoners and recovery of sight to the blind, to liberate the oppressed, and to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor” (Luke 4:18-19).

Throughout Luke’s story, people are liberated because someone shared God’s love and acceptance with them. Saul of Tarsus, the Ethiopian Eunuch, Cornelius, the Roman centurion, Simon Peter, and others. In each encounter, someone shared the good news of Jesus, the Risen Christ, and shared the love and acceptance of Jesus. 

The good news for Luke is living and loving in such a way that the barriers are overcome, and new relationships are established.

Good News in John

In the gospel according to John, if you have seen Jesus, you have seen God. Jesus says, “If you have seen me, you have seen the Father.” (John 14:19) And says, “I am the way and the truth and the life.” (John 14:6). For John, the good news is in Jesus you see the truth of God.

Throughout John’s story, John shows Jesus feeding, healing, caring, serving, and dying. He shows that in Jesus we see who God is. Philip says, “Show us the Father and we will be satisfied.” Just show us God. And Jesus responds by saying, “Have I been with you all this time and you still do not know me?” 

The good news for John is seeing who God is in Jesus. The work of God’s love is seen in the way Jesus loves. And then Jesus says, “As the Father has sent me, so I send you.” (John 20:21). By being followers of Jesus, you love as God has loved you.

The early followers of Jesus “devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching…” So, one of the characteristics of Christ-centered leaders is to teach, preach, and live the good news of Jesus.

Respond

O God thank you for the good news of your love and acceptance in Jesus and for the good news I can read and hear in the gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. By your grace, give me the faith to trust your good news so that I may become the person of love and acceptance you have created me to be. Give me the faith to trust you more. In Jesus’ name. Amen.

Return

Give God thanks for the people you encountered today. Where did you experience good news? How did you respond? In whom did you meet Jesus? Give God thanks for relationships restored and strengthened. Give God thanks for the grace to face the suffering and pain you experienced. Give God thanks for the presence and power to overcome the barriers that have separated you from others. Give God thanks for the opportunities you had to become more who God has created you to be. 

Next week we will look at the characteristics of community. I’m glad you and I are together on this journey of following Jesus. As you learn and grow keep in mind, who you are is how you lead.

Have you ever been in the middle of a conversation when you thought to yourself, “I need to remember this? Or “I think I misunderstood what was being said?” I had a conversation like that last week. A friend, a former parishioner, called to ask me what I thought about a particular issue. He had attended a meeting where what he thought was going to happen and what had happened did not coincide. So, he was asking me for clarification. As we discussed the issue, he said, “Wow. I have misunderstood what has been said. I think I have missed the point of what is happening.”

Misunderstandings and Missing the Point

At that moment, I thought to myself, “I need to remember this.” I had just read an article that said misunderstanding was the cause of 90% of all conflicts and my friend was in the midst of an inner conflict. He was trying to gain a clear understanding of what he was hearing. Because what he thought he knew and what he was hearing did not line up, he had a false impression on what was going on. By his own admission, he was missing the point.

As a leader, you deal with misunderstandings on a weekly, if not a daily, basis. The misunderstanding usually shows up either as mismatched expectations or unspoken expectations. You hear that someone was in the hospital and that you did not visit them, yet no one had informed you of the hospitalization. Or someone takes something you said in a sermon personally, as if you were talking directly to them. Or you realize that you could have shown more compassion, or you missed the intent of something that was said, or you misinterpreted something that happened.

Leaders Address Misunderstandings.

Misunderstandings happen all the time. Effective leaders have to deal with misunderstandings. How you respond reveals who you are and who you are is how you lead.

As I reflected upon my conversation with my friend, I thought of scripture, which usually comes to mind when I misunderstand or miss the point of something.

Read Romans 5:8

But God shows his love for us, because while we were still sinners Christ died for us. (CEB)

Reflect

Misunderstandings as Missing the Mark

Misunderstandings happen. One of the greatest misunderstandings is regarding what God has done for you and for me in and through Jesus. How you understand God’s love and God’s grace shapes how you lead. It affects your relationships and how you respond to misunderstandings and to conflict.

You and I are sinners. No news there. But your understanding that you are a sinner and how God responds to your sin is not only news but good news. The word for sin in Greek means “failure” as in “failure to hit a target” when throwing a spear or shooting an arrow. It was used for missing the road or for failing to meet one’s plan or hope or purpose. So, missing the point or misunderstanding the point is closely related. I don’t need to remind you or myself that neither of us have lived up to who God has created us to be. We have missed the target.

The New Testament on Misunderstandings

In the New Testament, the word describes our condition. It means to be “under the control” of missing the point. So, living under your misunderstanding, as if your misunderstanding is the truth, is sin. You are missing the target.

With this in mind, Paul is writing to the followers of Jesus, in Roman, to encourage them. He writes, “God shows his love for us, because while we were still sinners Christ died for us.” In other words, while you have been missing the target, missing the point, and misunderstanding, God has been loving you just the same. In fact, the proof of God’s love is made known in Jesus’ willingness to go to the cross.

By God’s action of love, you and I are reconciled to God. Now, don’t misunderstand this. God was not reconciled to us. Through Jesus, we are reconciled to God. The cross did not overcome God’s hostility to us. God is not hostile toward us. God is not alienated from us. The cross has overcome our hostility toward God, our alienation from God. Most of us never think of themselves as hostile to God. Even though we say we love God, we miss the target and miss the point when you do not show God’s love in our lives by loving one another.

Missing the Point

We miss the target and miss the point when we think we understand that God’s love in Jesus is just for us and not for others. The good news is, even with that misunderstanding, God still loves you, just as you are. God’s love is so great, that it does not leave you the way you are but assists you in becoming who God created you to be.

Paul writes, “You are at peace with God,” which means you are no longer at war with God, no longer alienated and hostile, no longer under the threat of God’s judgment. Because of God’s love for you, as seen and experienced in Jesus, you are the object of God’s well-being; you are becoming who God created you to be.

That action on the part of God makes you an instrument of love and hope for the world. Being a recipient of God’s love frees you from deciding who you will love. Here is one of our great misunderstandings. You and I do not produce love by our own efforts or affections. The truth is God’s love has been poured into us. You and I love because God first loved us.

God’s Love for Us

I spent most of my first 24 years of life trying to prove to my dad that I was worthy of his love. He was my hero. I wanted him to be proud of me. And I wanted to be like him. Although I do not remember a time when he put pressure on me to perform, I worked at pleasing him. He was a better-than-average athlete. He played football and basketball in high school and basketball in college. Because I wanted to be like him, I played football and basketball in high school. Always seeking his affirmation at the end of each game. He was a contractor. He built houses, churches, hotels, and libraries. As a teenager, I took friends around the community to show them the buildings my dad built. I was proud of him, and I wanted him to be proud of me. The only thing he said to me was, “You need to learn to lay brick. Because if what you choose to do in life doesn’t work out, you can always lay brick.”

At age 24, I was a student in seminary and a pastor of two small congregations. One day, unexpectedly, my mother called me and asked me to come to the house. She had something to discuss with me. When I arrived, she explained that the man who I called Dad, and who I had worked all my life to prove to him that he could be proud of me, had adopted me when I was 9 months old. At that moment, the reality of God’s grace came rushing into my life. My dad had chosen me to be his son, had given me his name and loved me from the beginning. He didn’t care whether I played football, basketball, or ever laid a brick. He already loved me and accepted me. All I could do was accept his love for me. My relationship with him grew deeper and more meaningful after that experience. I began to understand his love for me.

I had missed the point of his love. But I learned that his love for me was just like God’s love for each of us. God shows his love for us, because while we are still sinners, while we are misunderstanding his love and missing the point of loving others, Christ died for us. God has chosen you to be his beloved daughter and son. God has claimed you and given you a name. God already loves you and accepts you.

Loving and Leading in the Midst of Misunderstandings

As a leader, you have been set free to love others in the midst of misunderstandings and conflict. Because of God’s love for you, even while you have missed the point, you can show love and compassion for the people around you. You have been set free to love the people entrusted to you just as God in Jesus loves you.

That is what Paul wants his readers to know. That is, his message is to each of us. You are free to live in God’s love just as God has created you to live. You are free to love others as you have been loved. Remember, you are God’s beloved, chosen to love and lead in the time in which you are living. Accept who you are because who you are is how you lead.

Respond

O God, thank you for your love that is greater than my understanding. Fill me to overflowing so that every person I meet will experience your love and acceptance through me. In the midst of misunderstandings and conflict, let me be an instrument of your love and peace. By your grace, I offer myself to you in the love of Jesus. Amen

Return 

Give God thanks for the people you encountered today. Where did you experience misunderstandings today? How did you respond? Who helped you with your misunderstandings? How did you experience God’s love and grace in the midst of misunderstandings? Give God thanks for the wisdom you received to discern and understand. Give God thanks for the opportunity to become more who God has created you to be. 

Being a courageous leader is not always about doing something. Sometimes it is about slowing down and reflecting before acting. Steven Covey, in his book The Eighth Habit, says you have the freedom to choose how you act or react in every situation and circumstance in which you find yourself. You might not be able to control what happens to you, but you can decide how you will react to it. If someone treats you badly, regardless of who it is, you have the choice in how you will respond. In other words, who you are is how you lead.

Patience as a Leadership Skill

The eighth habit allows you to create the space needed to reflect before you respond. With that in mind, have you ever thought of patience as being a quality of a courageous leader? The list of qualities usually includes honesty, fairness, motivation, trustworthiness, and good communication. Seldom does patience make the list. 

Too often patience is thought of as a weakness when it comes to leadership skills. You are expected to make a split-second decision and move on to the next thing. And if you take time to consider your options or to think strategically, you are viewed as slow or incompetent.

Patience and Emotional Intelligence

So, let’s consider Webster’s definition of patience, “the quality of being capable of bearing affliction calmly.” From that perspective, patience is part of your emotional intelligence. When you understand patience as having the ability to stay calm in the face of disappointment, adversity, or distress, then being patient allows you to better process challenging situations. 

Patience helps you sort out your thoughts and to bring your feelings under control. It reduces the risk of angry outbursts. It helps you improve the quality of your decisions. Patience is key to developing relationships, establishing trust, and instilling hope. Patience is a cornerstone of true and courageous leadership.

Patience is Difficult to Practice

In his book, If You Will Lead: Enduring Wisdom for the 21st-Century, Doug Moran writes, “Patience is an easy thing to talk about, but it is extremely difficult to practice.” Then he uses Rudyard Kipling’s poem “If” to describe patience:

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,

Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,”

Moran writes, “Most of us think of patience as a construct of time, but Kipling was addressing the broader definition – enduring difficulty and hardship while awaiting the appropriate opportunity to act.” He is also referring to the patience required to bear the nagging and sniping that often accompanies a decision to wait. 

Patience is Courageous

As a courageous leader, you use patience when you focus on your mission, name the current reality, and wait with understanding and compassion as you help others take the appropriate and effective action needed to live into the mission. Again, patience requires composure and character. By modeling patience, you reinforce the importance of focusing on the mission and long-term goals. 

Keep in mind that the bigger the goal, the more patience is required to remain committed. It will require patience with strategic planning, negotiation, people development, vision casting, etc. Moving from where you are to where you want to usually means you must face issues, barriers, and obstacles along the way. It is easy to see what you want to accomplish and jump ahead without exercising the patience needed to get there. Being a courageous leader means understanding that patience might require sacrificing short-term glory for long-term results. 

Learning Patience

So, why am I writing about leadership and patience? I am learning more about patience each day, with each and every new interaction with you, our colleagues, and others who I am meeting along the way.

I have often heard that patience is a virtue, but it is also one of the “fruits of the spirit” listed by Paul in Galatians 5:22-24: “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against things like this. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the self with its passions and its desires.” 

As a fruit of the Spirit, or as a characteristic of a follower of Jesus, patience is “the ability to hold one’s temper for a long time.” The word is translated as “longsuffering” in the King James Version. It comes from a position of power or authority. You might have the ability to take revenge or cause trouble or react with just cause, but patience brings self-restraint and careful thinking. 

As a follower of Jesus, you chose to love when love is not present. You model compassion and grace as you lead through trying situations. Because God is patient or longsuffering with you, you are to suffer long with others. You not only become a better person and leader, but you also reveal who you are as a daughter or son of God. Who you are is how you lead. 

Reminders About Patience

So, as you lead through turbulence and chaos, be patient with those entrusted to your care. When you are faced with complex decisions in demanding situations with people who are insisting on their own way, keep the following in mind: 

Take time to pause and breathe before responding. Patience allows you to slow down and maximize your time and decision-making. Abraham Lincoln once said, “If I had six hours to chop down a tree, I would spend the first four hours sharpening the ax. 

Keep the end in mind. Stay focused on your mission. There will be distractions, barriers, and detours along the way. Patience allows you to face each challenge as you move toward your goal. 

Keep in mind the people with whom you are interacting. Don’t take your personal frustration out on them. Be generous. Patience allows you to be generous with them, giving them the benefit of the doubt. 

Keep in mind what you need to communicate along the way. When is the best time to communicate? How will you share information? Patience allows you to slow down and think things through. Understand that the way you express yourself can motivate and uplift others. 

As you model the power of patience, others will follow your lead. Be prepared to respond to the unexpected. The best plans usually have to be modified along the way. The sign of a good plan and effective leader is the ability to respond effectively when things go awry. Unforeseen events are always a test of patience. Patience allows you to respond in a healthy and effective way. 

Be a Patient, Courageous Leader

There are those who say, “Patience is a virtue.” They are correct. But as a leader, patience is a characteristic of courage and effectiveness. You are facing challenges for which you are unprepared. Take the time to pause and reflect. Courageously endure the pressure to react before responding.The words of Kipling, “wait and not be tired by waiting,” will reveal who you are as a leader. Because who you are is how you lead. 

Have you heard the word discernment lately? I ask you with a smile because in every direction I turn I meet a leader or a congregation in the process of discernment. As I have reflected upon what I have heard and experienced, I think it is time that leaders take a good look at the intrinsic value of discernment in their leadership style and decision-making. 

What is Discernment?

Discernment is a unique discipline that takes practice and insight. It is wisdom based upon facts as well as context, options, implications, and motivation. It is a learned skill that focuses on the process of reflection based upon the values, principles, and integrity of the leader and others engaged in the process.  

Too often a leader will discern a direction for an organization or make a decision involving the people entrusted to his or her care and then ask those followers to trust their discernment and decision-making.

What would happen if you, as the leader, would become vulnerable enough to depend on the discernment of a larger body of followers who might be as focused on God’s direction as you are as the leader?

Let’s take a moment to read the scripture, reflect upon it, respond to it, and at the end of the day return to assess what has been learned through implementation and experience.

Read Philippians 1:9-10 

This is my prayer: that your love might become even more and more rich with knowledge and all kinds of insight. I pray this so that you will be able to decide what really matters and so you will be sincere and blameless on the day of Christ. (CEB) 

And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, (NIV) 

Reflect

The apostle Paul prayed for Jesus’ followers in Philippi to have discernment so they could judge the right way to go in life. He prayed that they would be able to decide what really matters and to make their judgments accordingly. 

What does it mean to discern something? Discernment, at its best, is the ability to recognize small details, accurately tell the difference between things that are similar, and make intelligent judgments by using such observations. This ability was important to Paul. He writes to the Jesus followers in Rome to be transformed by the renewing of their minds so that they could discern the will of God, that which was good, acceptable, and perfect (Romans 12:2). 

Paul’s prayer is not just for individuals but for the entire church body. We usually think of discernment as an exercise of the mind and heart of the leader, but discernment is also of the mind and heart of the body of people who are making decisions. Your commitment to leading people in discerning and doing the will of God is what distinguishes you as a spiritual leader. You help people to think for themselves and to discern who to follow and to whom they should listen. 

A Model of Discernment

Let me offer one model which will assist you as a leader, especially during these days in which we are living. This process is known as “The Fenhagan Model For Corporate Discernment.” It was developed by James C. Fenhagen and can be found in his book, Ministry and Solitude.   

It is designed to assist in making decisions regarding ministry opportunities or projects. It is to be used when groups are making major decisions and are looking for the best direction for the church or organization. It is a process of prayer, meditation, and openness to the guidance of the Holy Spirit. It engages participation in searching the scripture, prayer, and listening to God and one another. 

Starting the Discernment Process

The process begins when all possible information is gathered, clearly identified, plainly described, and made available to those who will be engaged in the deliberation.  

Discernment Steps

First, start with scripture. Below are examples to use for setting the context. You might have other scriptures to help frame and focus your discernment. 

  • Psalm 119:125: I’m your servant! Help me understand so I can know your laws. (CEB) Or, I am your servant, give me discernment that I may understand your statutes (NIV) 
  • James 1:5: But anyone who needs wisdom should ask God, whose very nature is to give to everyone without a second thought, without keeping score. Wisdom will certainly be given to those who ask. (CEB) 
  • Gaining discernment or sound judgment involves trusting God and one another. King Soloman  advised his son to hang on to discernment so that he would stay safe and secure on life’s course:
  • Proverbs 3:5–6: Trust in the Lord with all your heart; don’t rely on your own intelligence. Know him in all your paths, and he will keep your ways straight. (CEB) 
  • Proverbs 3:21–23: My son, don’t let them (common sense and discernment) slip from your eyes; hold on to sound judgment and discretion. They will be life for your whole being, and an ornament for your neck. Then you will walk safely on your path, and your foot won’t stumble. 
  • And as we mentioned before, the apostle Paul prayed for the believers in Philippi to have discernment so they could judge the right way to go in life:
  • Philippians 1:9–10: And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ. (NIV) 

Second, provide a time to ask and answer questions regarding the information provided. Too often in this process, we use only the information that helps move toward the decision we want. Making all information available allows persons the freedom needed to hear God’s direction in their discernment. God will speak through the persons who are gathered. 

Third, is a time of sharing. Each person has the opportunity to share the reasons he or she discerns against moving in a particular direction.  It is important that all people participate. If a person does not have a reason or wishes not to give a reason, he or she can pass. It is important that they have the opportunity to participate. When the decision has been made, it is important that all persons have participated.  

Fourth is a period of prayer and meditation. After each person has reported, take the time to pray and reflect upon the seriousness of what has been reported. Ask the group to set aside emotions and preferences and to listen closely to what God is saying.   

Fifth, is another time of sharing. Each person has the opportunity to share his or her own personal discernment regarding moving forward. Again, it is important that all persons participate. If a person does not have a reason or wishes not to give a reason, he or she can pass. It is important that they have the opportunity to participate. When the decision has been made, all persons should have participated.   

Sixth is a period of prayer and meditation. After each person has reported, take the time to pray and reflect upon the seriousness of what has been reported. Ask the group to set aside emotions and preferences and to listen closely to what God is saying. 

Continue Until Consensus Is Reached in Discernment

If no clear consensus emerges, the process continues. Take the time to sort out and weigh the reasons behind the pros and cons, recording those reasons so that they are available to all, and to discern communally, in the light of what has been listed, the direction to which the community is called by God.  

In commenting on this aspect of the process, John Futrell, in his book, Communal Discernment: Reflection on Experience, writes, “…if the conditions of authentic communal discernment have been fulfilled (i.e., if there is genuine openness to the Spirit), the decision should be made clear, and confirmation should be experienced unanimously through shared deep peace…finding God together.”  

Final Steps for Discernment to Reach a Decision

Through scripture, prayer, reflection, and conversation, your church or organization can reach a decision.  Even though you might want total agreement, the reality is there will be some who disagree with the decision being made. So, here is the final part of the process.

Ask each participant the following questions:

  • Do you agree with the decision? If the answer is yes, you have affirmation of the decision. If the answer is no, ask the following question:
  • If you don’t fully agree, can you live with the decision? If the answer is yes, you have affirmation of the decision. If the answer is no, ask the following question:
  • If you don’t agree, can you live with the decision? If the answer is yes, you have affirmation of the decision. Seldom is there a totally negative response. But if the participant says I don’t agree with the decision and I can’t live it, then say, “God must be saying something different to you. We are ready to listen and to learn what God is saying. What is God saying? How do we move forward?

Reaching a Decision

You will either get an affirmation of the decision or a new direction will surface. If it is a viable alternative, lead the process of discernment again. When you are vulnerable and listening to God and to the people, the right decision will be made. 

Finally, when the decision has been made and everyone can live with it, give God thanks and affirm the corporate commitment to carry out the decision.

Paul’s prayer was for the entire church body to grow in love and to gain more knowledge and depth of insight so that the body might be able to discern what is best. 

Your commitment to lead people in discerning and doing the will of God is what distinguishes you as a spiritual leader. Who you are is how you lead.  

Respond

O God, thank you for your call upon my life. Give me the wisdom and insight to trust you in and through the people you have given me to love and serve. In all I say and do, may I be a reflection of your love and care, even in the decisions I make and help others to make. By your grace, let me and the people entrusted to my care, be a part of what you are blessing in the name of Jesus.  Amen

Return

Give God thanks for the people you encountered today. What decisions did you make? How were you able to cut through the confusion and ambiguity? Give God thanks for the wisdom you received to discern and understand? Are you able to be vulnerable enough to trust the people you lead to make decisions? What do you need to trust others as they trust you?