As a leader, how have you responded to nostalgia? In what situations, meetings, or decisions has nostalgia been helpful? On the other hand, how has nostalgia gotten in the way of moving forward with the mission of the church?
When I was in college, the number one song on the charts was “Memories” sung by Barbara Streisand. Part of the lyrics went like this:
Memories, light the corners of my mind
Misty watercolor memories of the way we were
Scattered pictures of the smiles we left behind
Smiles we gave to one another for the way we were
Memories may be beautiful and yet
What’s too painful to remember
We simply choose to forget
Even today, when I hear the song, I am taken back to a particular time and place with particular individuals. Just as the song says, memories light the corners of my mind.
Memories are Powerful
Memories are powerful. Gil Rendel in his book, Quietly Courageous, writes: “Most memories are fond, but not all memories are pleasant. They can include some unhappy time or a time of loss. But for most of us, memories are enjoyable, instructive, comfortable, and important. At times memories are strong enough to make us wonder what it would be like to go back to that time in reality.”
Rendel says that nostalgia is like that. Nostalgia takes us from what bothers us now to what we remember to be a better time. It takes us from what is missing now to what was present in the past.
Nostalgia’s Impact on Leadership
In other words, nostalgia is a warmly remembered past. From Latin, the word “nostalgia” means a return home from pain and suffering. Brené Brown in her book, Atlas of the Heart, points out that “nostalgia was initially a medical term coined in the 17th century for a severe form of homesickness.” She points out that soldiers, displaced from their homes and thrust into the horrors of war, would often succumb to this ailment. Symptoms ranged from anxiety and insomnia to irregular heartbeat and anorexia. In extreme cases, it could even be fatal.
Nostalgia was understood as a natural coping mechanism. Rendel reminds us that it has a number of benefits, such as “an improved mood, increased social connectedness, and positive self-regard.” At its heart, when facing an unpleasant or stressful present, nostalgia has always connected to the warmly remembered past that once was and is remembered as better than what it is now. It is a longing to go home.
So, how do you, as a leader, respond to nostalgia when it tends to stand in the way of leading people to live and love in the present? Read the story of restoring worship in Israel after the Temple had been destroyed and take note of the responses and reactions of the leaders as the foundation of the new Temple was put into place.
Read Ezra 3:1-13
3 When the seventh month came and the Israelites were in their[a] towns, the people gathered together as one in Jerusalem. 2 Then Jeshua son of Jozadak with his fellow priests and Zerubbabel son of Shealtiel with his kin set out to build the altar of the God of Israel, to offer burnt offerings on it, as prescribed in the law of Moses the man of God. 3 They set up the altar on its foundation because they were in dread of the people of the lands, and they offered burnt offerings upon it to the Lord, morning and evening. 4 And they kept the Festival of Booths,] as prescribed, and offered the daily burnt offerings by number according to the ordinance, as required for each day, 5 and after that the regular burnt offerings, the offerings at the new moon and at all the sacred festivals of the Lord, and the offerings of everyone who made a freewill offering to the Lord. 6 From the first day of the seventh month they began to offer burnt offerings to the Lord. But the foundation of the temple of the Lord was not yet laid. 7 So they gave money to the masons and the carpenters, and food, drink, and oil to the Sidonians and the Tyrians to bring cedar trees from Lebanon to the sea, to Joppa, according to the grant that they had from King Cyrus of Persia.
In the second year after their arrival at the house of God at Jerusalem, in the second month, Zerubbabel son of Shealtiel and Jeshua son of Jozadak made a beginning, together with the rest of their people, the priests and the Levites and all who had come to Jerusalem from the captivity. They appointed the Levites from twenty years old and up to have the oversight of the work on the house of the Lord. 9 And Jeshua with his sons and his kin, and Kadmiel and his sons, Binnui and Hodaviah,[c] along with the sons of Henadad, the Levites, their sons and kin, together took charge of the workers in the house of God.
When the builders laid the foundation of the temple of the Lord, the priests in their vestments were stationed to praise the Lord with trumpets, and the Levites, the sons of Asaph, with cymbals, according to the directions of King David of Israel; 11 and they sang responsively, praising and giving thanks to the Lord, “For he is good, for his steadfast love endures forever toward Israel.” And all the people responded with a great shout when they praised the Lord because the foundation of the house of the Lord had been laid. 12 But many of the priests and Levites and heads of families, old people who had seen the first house on its foundations, wept with a loud voice when they saw this house, though many shouted aloud for joy, 13 so that the people could not distinguish the sound of the joyful shout from the sound of the people’s weeping, for the people shouted so loudly that the sound was heard far away.
Reflect on Ezra 3
This is a familiar story of the building of the new temple in Jerusalem following the time when the Temple had been destroyed and the Hebrew people had been driven out of their homeland. King Cyrus of Persia issued a proclamation that allowed the Israelites to return to Jerusalem and to rebuild the temple. A little more than a year after their return the Israelites had completed the construction of the foundation of the new temple. It was enough to allow for the religious practices of the people to begin.
It was at that point that a great celebration was planned, with priests dressed in all their robes, with trumpets and cymbals being played, and the people, both young and old, gathered. “And all the people responded with a great shout when they praised the Lord because the foundation of the house of the Lord had been laid. But many of the priests and Levites and heads of families, old people who had seen the first house on its foundations, wept with a loud voice when they saw this house, though many shouted aloud for joy…”
In other words, the people who gathered saw two different stories. Some saw the new temple and a promise of a new future, and they made loud sounds of joy. Others saw only a different temple, not the remembered temple of old, and saw a past that slopped away unfulfilled, and they made loud sounds of weeping.
The scripture says, “so that the people could not distinguish the sound of the joyful shout from the sound of the people’s weeping, for the people shouted so loudly that the sound was heard far away.”
Ezra 3 and church leadership lessons
Although this story is told as part of Hebrew history, it is descriptive of many of our churches. I know I am making it simpler than it is, but it seems there is a revolutionary story and a reactionary story. You, as a courageous Christ-centered leader, are standing in the middle of the two stories.
The revolutionary sees the future and its promise. The reactionary sees the past and resists the idealized lies of the future. As a leader, you are surrounded with people who are either ready to step into an uncertain future or stay in the once secure past.
As a follower of Jesus, given the responsibility to lead, you must learn how to stand with confidence in the midst of the anxiety of the present moment (current reality) and navigate between the already insufficient past and the clearly uncertain future. You must understand that the unknown future, along with the anxiety of the present, makes the nostalgic past a great temptation. You must also understand that when people feel insecure, they naturally seek out a confident voice. It is easy to be confident about what has already happened and to not rock the boat and to keep the peace.
Balancing Past and Future in Church Leadership
You must learn in whom you place your confidence, not just for yourself but for the sake of the mission which works for the transformation of the community and the world.
It is also a temptation to dismiss current reality and focus upon an aspirational reality. So, you work harder at what you already know in order to recapture a time and strength that no longer exists. Oh, the hard work carries the rewards of feeling certain and secure in your efforts and satisfaction of getting tired from work that is familiar. But nostalgia does not ask you how to be different for the future. That is much harder work.
Nostalgia’s attractiveness is that you avoid difficult questions. Too often, for the sake of keeping peace, you avoid anything that will create anxiety and chaos. To be an effective leader, you must know the difference between planning and learning.
Church Planning v Church Learning
There is less anxiety, and it is more comfortable to gather people together for planning. Planning infers understanding. If we know where we are and know where we want to go, planning means we only need to put steps in place to get there from here.
What would happen if you called people together for learning? Learning might not lead to immediate action, but it does provide the opportunity to ask questions that might not necessarily be easy to answer. For example, how do people who are not related to the church, form a community and search for meaning if they are not going to be a part of the church as an institution? Or what does worship look like for people who are not going to come into our church buildings? I am sure those questions lead to more difficult questions.
In planning, you prepare for people who are already present with the hope you might attract a few people who are not present. In learning, you discover ways to relate to people where they are and step out to respond to them. Learning might lead you to being incarnational and to doing church in a different way. Oh, just know that will create more anxiety and chaos.
Too often we get stuck in the past and are held hostage by nostalgia.
Take Memories and Move into the Future
John Claypool tells the story of his family farm in western Kentucky. His family had lived on the land for six generations. During a storm, the wind blew over an old pear tree that had been there as long as anybody could remember. He said his grandfather was saddened to lose the tree on which he had climbed as a boy and whose fruit he had eaten all his life.
A neighbor came by and said, “Doc, I’m really sorry to see your pear tree blown down.”
His grandfather said, “I’m sorry too. It was a real part of my past.”
“What are you going to do?”
His grandfather paused for a moment and said, “I’m going to pick the fruit and burn what’s left.”
Memories, light the corners of my mind. How will you respond to those memories?
Name what has been good and what has gotten you to this point in ministry? Pick the fruit. Celebrate by giving thanks. Name the lessons that were learned. Enjoy the memories. Then, take what you have learned and the memories and move into the future.
Return
As you reflect upon the day, give God thanks for the memories of the day. What have you learned about yourself today? What did you learn about others? Give God thanks for what you are learning.
Where did you see Jesus today? What was the situation or circumstance of your experience? Give God thanks for the experience. Ask God to give you more opportunities to see Jesus in everyday and ordinary ways.
Who received God’s love through you today? What step will you take to allow God to
love others more through you?
What will you do differently tomorrow?