Being a Good Neighbor

Here is a question for those of you who watch television. Have you watched the show on HGTV called “House Hunters”? For those who have not seen the show, it is a reality show that follows the activities and decisions of people searching for a new house. Almost every episode focuses upon a kitchen with granite countertops. Then, is there a space for a home office? What about the curb appeal? Is the house located in a good school district? Is it too close to a busy street?

One question that has not been asked is, at least while I have watched, “Who are the neighbors?”

Over the years, I have learned that the people we live next to have a big impact on who we are and how we view the world. As you have read over and over in this blog, relationships are important. In fact, relationships are more important than bricks and mortar, granite countertops, and the busy street.

When Jesus was asked to reduce everything in the Bible into one command he said: Love God with everything you have and love your neighbor as yourself.

Read Matthew 22:36-40

“Teacher, which commandment in the law is the greatest?”  He said to him, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the greatest and first commandment. And a second is like it: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ On these two commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets.”

Reflect on Matthew 22

Isn’t it interesting that getting to know your neighbors can be intimidating? When the news you read or hear is from social media or television, you are bombarded with stories of child abuse, drug and alcohol addiction, out-of-control debt, and unexpected violence, not only on city streets but in your community. I confess, there are times I try to escape it. Especially when I grow weary of strangers, even the ones who live in my neighborhood.

Regarding our neighbors being strangers, Jay Pathak and Dave Runyon, in their book, The Art of Neighboring: Building Genuine Relationships Right Outside Your Door, write, “This isn’t what Jesus envisioned for us and for our world. We know we can do more. And we know that we can’t just sit around waiting for someone else to do it. But it’s hard to know where to start.”

What do you see in your neighborhood?

So, to get started, they suggest that you look around your own neighborhood. What do you see and how do you respond?

When you see a yard full of knee-high weeds, do you complain about the lawn being unkept? Do you call the HOA and ask that something be done to keep the covenant? Do you consider that maybe someone is sick and might need more than help with the lawn?

What do you see? You noticed a family moving in a few weeks ago. It is clear none of them speak English well and the children don’t seem to be attending school. Do you think, why did these people choose this neighborhood? Do you call the school district to tell them about the children? Do you consider helping them get adjusted to their new environment?

What do you see? What about the elderly couple down the street? You have noticed that no one seems to come to visit. Do they have enough to eat? How are they caring for themselves? Isn’t there someone who can help them?

What about the three middle-aged adults who live in the house on the corner? What’s their relationship, and why do they share the same house? And who lives across the street? There never seem to be any grown-ups around, only teenagers coming and going and playing their music loudly. Why do the folks on the other corner leave their garbage cans by the curb for days? Do they travel a lot?

Although these situations might be just outside your door, you hope that someone will do something to help. It is easy to draw conclusions about the neighbors you only watch at a distance. So, when you see an unkempt yard, a slew of tattoos, a weird haircut, or hear the loud music, you make up what you don’t know. You make assumptions about the people who live around you, but it is these assumptions that keep you from being the neighbor you could be.

What do you think Jesus is saying when he says, “love your neighbor as you love yourself?” Have you considered that getting to know your neighbors and developing relationships with them has the potential to change the world?

What might happen if you took the time to get to know the people in your neighborhood? You might find out that most of them are just like you. They go to work, love their children, care for aging parents, have pains in their backs, and wish the world could be different. At the end of the day, they long for a place to belong, a place to be accepted and cared for. They want to do something significant with their lives, something that really matters.

What good things might happen if you got to know the people in your neighborhood and they got to know you?

Respond

So, look around your own neighborhood. Who are the neighbors? Whether you have lived in the neighborhood for years or are new, living there only a few months, one way to “love your neighbor as yourself” is to pray for them. Through prayer you will practice keeping your focus upon God’s love as well as focus upon loving your neighbor.

Pray Daily

A daily prayer routine will help you grow as a follower of Jesus, help you become a human touch of God’s love, as well as work for the transformation of your neighborhood. Here is one way to pray for your neighbors:

Standing at your front door, pray for your neighbor (by name if you know it) who lives to your right, then to your left, now across the street, and behind you. Pray for their families (each person by name, especially the children).

Here is a prayer to get you started:

O God, thank you for the people who live around me. Today I ask your blessing upon (name) and his/her family (names if possible).  I pray for his/her health and well-being.  I pray for your goodness to be known to him/her throughout this day.  And when the time is right, use me as an instrument of your love and compassion in his/her life.  I offer them and myself to you in the name of Jesus.  Amen.

If you don’t know them by name, pray for them in a way that you will remember them. Below are a couple examples:  

O God, thank you for the man/woman driving the blue minivan. Today I ask your blessing upon him/her and his/her family. I pray for his/her health and well-being. Keep them safe while driving and may he/she know of your goodness throughout the day…

O God thank you for the family that lives in the white house with the black shutters. Today I ask your blessing upon them…

Pray for the children, the teenagers, and the elderly in your neighborhood. I am sure you get the point. Your prayers will help keep you focused and ready to be the human touch of God’s love at the appropriate time.

You have an opportunity to pray for at least four families in your neighborhood.  Now, if you don’t live in a neighborhood, be creative. Pray for the families that do live around you, even if they are a mile down the road.  

You can transform your neighborhood by being a good neighbor as you practice loving your neighbors.

Return to Reflect on the Day

Give God thanks for the neighbors you encountered. Did you pray for them? In what situations did you decide to respond in love? What did you learn about them? What did you learn about yourself? What will you do differently tomorrow? Give God thanks for the experiences that have helped you become more who God created you to be.